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When Is Divorce Permissible?
Praise Jesus brothers and sisters. He is able to lead us and guide us in a way that no man, no pastor, no Bible study can ever lead us or guide us. What I want to speak about today is divorce and remarriage. And I want to bring a bit of clarity to one of my videos that I made some days ago. It was called something like living with an unbeliever. In that video I had mentioned the reasons, the one reason Jesus gives for divorce, which I want to read that now, and then I also gave another reason for separation. Now, the degree of what it would mean to separate from someone I cannot say or give. Obviously, we have man's law and if you're married before man, there is the paperwork and everything you'd have to go through for marriage and for divorce. I am not a counselor for that whatsoever and I don't claim to be. Neither do I stand for God in what He can tell you. I cannot be God for you. I'm not going to stand in God, in other words, and tell you what you have to do as far as getting married or getting divorced, the Lord Jesus will speak for Himself, be the one who is standing in the place of God or trying to justify your divorce or your marriage.
I want to first read to you what Jesus said in regards to marriage and divorce. This is found in Matthew Chapter 19. 7They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” 8He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”
So in some versions we have this word immorality being fornication, which some people say that what Jesus is talking about for the only grounds of divorce, being fornication, being sex before marriage, whereas other people say it's more general to any sort of immorality or sexual activity outside the marriage bed that defiles your marriage bed. In my video that I made several weeks ago, I also mentioned a reason for separation would be, if you are in an abusive relationship. I may also add on to that drug abuse or other things that cause great grief to your children. I don't think any righteous man would ever say that a spouse needs to keep herself or her children in a violent situation.
And what I want to say right here is that if we being evil know how to judge rightfully, if we know how to support the innocent, then how much more does our Father in heaven know how to support and protect His children? There are some women who for years in the church have been abused by abusive husbands. The message that I made a few weeks ago was speaking specifically to that situation. But most likely it is not speaking to you, unless you are in an abusive situation. So you cannot take the words of my video and find crowns, guys, to get divorced based on the fact that I said if your husband is abusive, that gives you grounds for separation.
Also, I am not the one to say what degree separation means, whether that's legally before men or for God. I want to clarify here. If a woman decides that she needs to separate from her husband, she is not in sin if she leaves with her children to protect herself and her children, she certainly is not in sin, guys. Even if her husband says, “you have divorced me before God because you're no longer living in my house, I don't care if you have paperwork or not, you are divorced from me.” Even if he tries to manipulate her and his children, this woman is not in sin if she chooses to protect her children, to protect the innocent and to protect her own life from abuse. And I think any godly man would also have to agree. But this is specifically a situation of abuse. It cannot be applied to you if you just want to leave, because your husband did something that you don't approve of, or he had some other kind of sin in his life. Obviously, there are a lot of marriages and the husband is doing something that is ungodly, he's looking at pornography, he is in some kind of affair, but maybe not physical, all these situations specifically have to be worked out with Jesus Christ. and you cannot consult some counselor like me or someone else on the Internet or some pastor to tell you what to do to justify yourself in divorcing your husband or your wife. Those specific situations have to be brought before Jesus. and if you are a child of God, you already know this.
But in regards to abuse, if you are in an abusive relationship and your husband is manipulating you using the words of Jesus, no longer is that the words of Jesus, but that is, it's like a demon, it's manipulation, using the Bible to try to control you. And because a lot of men have abused their position of authority in the church, they have abused their wife using the Bible. It makes no sense for her to adhere to her husband and stay in that household when he is only speaking for the devil. Now, to what degree she should separate, I am not to say, should she physically go out and file for a divorce? I cannot say that. Is it divorced before God because she physically separated but didn't file paperwork? I cannot say that. God knows. God knows to what degree you should be separated and for what amount of time if that is temporary or permanent.
In the best case, a situation, guys, you would separate from your ungodly spouse who is abusive. You would pray for him and the Lord would restore him and you would come back with your family, with your children, and the Lord would bless your marriage. You would forgive him. The Lord would forgive both of you and you would go on raising your children and living your life in a godly marriage, that would be the best case situation. But there are cases that end in divorce and Jesus knows how to guide you. But as far as what I can say, I can't tell you what to do and no man can. No one can coach you in your marriage saying “this is when you are validated to get a divorce” or “this is when you are justified to be remarried”. A lot of people suffer a great deal of condemnation over this. Even though a woman may want to separate from her husband and I just mean physically, she feels compelled not to, even if she's being abused, because she thinks she will be in sin and therefore go to hell and be punished by God unless she stays in that abusive relationship.
So all I want to say here is we need to protect the innocent, whatever it means to protect the innocent, to uphold the righteous and to condemn wickedness. That is what we need to do. And if any man tries to quote Jesus, who does it in a wicked way, twisting the Bible, twisting the ways of Jesus, we need to immediately recognize that and not uphold the wicked man who is trying to quote the words of Jesus.
I sure hope that you're not just looking for justification to get divorced. Some of you because you have hit a rough patch in your marriage, consider divorce and instead of listening to Jesus, you will listen to the words of a man. You will listen to the words of your own interpretation from the Bible, and you will make yourself feel justified to divorce. We would do much better to continue to stay in fervent prayer. You would do much better to seek the Lord with all your heart and wait on His answer instead of looking around to family members, to prophets, to pastors, to leaders in the church for answers. There is no easy, quick answer for you. Jesus expects that we just wait on Him. And as we daily seek Him, He gives us our daily bread. And as we pray, He gives us the revelation we need. Sometimes He calls us to sit back and to continue to pray for our spouse, that they may repent. Sometimes He may have people that are in a very bad, abusive relationship separate for some time, maybe a year, and then He will restore that marriage. Who knows what the Lord will do, but that is His business.
Not someone else's as a middleman getting in between God's plan for your marriage. So don't let any of my words confuse you. I never want something I say to be a hindrance from people going to Jesus Christ. may no one look to me for justification for evil. If you're looking to do evil, your sins are your own. They're not mine. But as for me, I want to encourage people to follow Jesus, to endure. I want to encourage people that they should continue to fight for their marriage, overcome lust, defeat pornography, expose sin. I want to continue to uphold the righteous, uphold the innocent. I want to be an advocate for those who are pure before God. And all of us need to do that as His true church. And as each situation comes up individually, we just need to go before the Lord and ask Him what we need to do.
But don't let anyone manipulate you from the Bible telling you you should get divorced, or it's justifiable, or that you shouldn't, meaning that you shouldn't separate if it is the will of God that you separate for your own protection of yourself and your family. I cannot offer you any words of wisdom as the Holy Spirit can. But my words of wisdom are this: if you seek the Lord, He gives to all liberally for those who will sit at His feet and learn from Him. Are we going to Jesus? Are we waiting upon Him in prayer? Or are we running to men for answers? May the grace of Jesus be with you.
When Is Divorce Permissible?
Praise Jesus brothers and sisters. He is able to lead us and guide us in a way that no man, no pastor, no Bible study can ever lead us or guide us. What I want to speak about today is divorce and remarriage. And I want to bring a bit of clarity to one of my videos that I made some days ago. It was called something like living with an unbeliever. In that video I had mentioned the reasons, the one reason Jesus gives for divorce, which I want to read that now, and then I also gave another reason for separation. Now, the degree of what it would mean to separate from someone I cannot say or give. Obviously, we have man's law and if you're married before man, there is the paperwork and everything you'd have to go through for marriage and for divorce. I am not a counselor for that whatsoever and I don't claim to be. Neither do I stand for God in what He can tell you. I cannot be God for you. I'm not going to stand in God, in other words, and tell you what you have to do as far as getting married or getting divorced, the Lord Jesus will speak for Himself, be the one who is standing in the place of God or trying to justify your divorce or your marriage.
I want to first read to you what Jesus said in regards to marriage and divorce. This is found in Matthew Chapter 19. 7They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?” 8He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”
So in some versions we have this word immorality being fornication, which some people say that what Jesus is talking about for the only grounds of divorce, being fornication, being sex before marriage, whereas other people say it's more general to any sort of immorality or sexual activity outside the marriage bed that defiles your marriage bed. In my video that I made several weeks ago, I also mentioned a reason for separation would be, if you are in an abusive relationship. I may also add on to that drug abuse or other things that cause great grief to your children. I don't think any righteous man would ever say that a spouse needs to keep herself or her children in a violent situation.
And what I want to say right here is that if we being evil know how to judge rightfully, if we know how to support the innocent, then how much more does our Father in heaven know how to support and protect His children? There are some women who for years in the church have been abused by abusive husbands. The message that I made a few weeks ago was speaking specifically to that situation. But most likely it is not speaking to you, unless you are in an abusive situation. So you cannot take the words of my video and find crowns, guys, to get divorced based on the fact that I said if your husband is abusive, that gives you grounds for separation.
Also, I am not the one to say what degree separation means, whether that's legally before men or for God. I want to clarify here. If a woman decides that she needs to separate from her husband, she is not in sin if she leaves with her children to protect herself and her children, she certainly is not in sin, guys. Even if her husband says, “you have divorced me before God because you're no longer living in my house, I don't care if you have paperwork or not, you are divorced from me.” Even if he tries to manipulate her and his children, this woman is not in sin if she chooses to protect her children, to protect the innocent and to protect her own life from abuse. And I think any godly man would also have to agree. But this is specifically a situation of abuse. It cannot be applied to you if you just want to leave, because your husband did something that you don't approve of, or he had some other kind of sin in his life. Obviously, there are a lot of marriages and the husband is doing something that is ungodly, he's looking at pornography, he is in some kind of affair, but maybe not physical, all these situations specifically have to be worked out with Jesus Christ. and you cannot consult some counselor like me or someone else on the Internet or some pastor to tell you what to do to justify yourself in divorcing your husband or your wife. Those specific situations have to be brought before Jesus. and if you are a child of God, you already know this.
But in regards to abuse, if you are in an abusive relationship and your husband is manipulating you using the words of Jesus, no longer is that the words of Jesus, but that is, it's like a demon, it's manipulation, using the Bible to try to control you. And because a lot of men have abused their position of authority in the church, they have abused their wife using the Bible. It makes no sense for her to adhere to her husband and stay in that household when he is only speaking for the devil. Now, to what degree she should separate, I am not to say, should she physically go out and file for a divorce? I cannot say that. Is it divorced before God because she physically separated but didn't file paperwork? I cannot say that. God knows. God knows to what degree you should be separated and for what amount of time if that is temporary or permanent.
In the best case, a situation, guys, you would separate from your ungodly spouse who is abusive. You would pray for him and the Lord would restore him and you would come back with your family, with your children, and the Lord would bless your marriage. You would forgive him. The Lord would forgive both of you and you would go on raising your children and living your life in a godly marriage, that would be the best case situation. But there are cases that end in divorce and Jesus knows how to guide you. But as far as what I can say, I can't tell you what to do and no man can. No one can coach you in your marriage saying “this is when you are validated to get a divorce” or “this is when you are justified to be remarried”. A lot of people suffer a great deal of condemnation over this. Even though a woman may want to separate from her husband and I just mean physically, she feels compelled not to, even if she's being abused, because she thinks she will be in sin and therefore go to hell and be punished by God unless she stays in that abusive relationship.
So all I want to say here is we need to protect the innocent, whatever it means to protect the innocent, to uphold the righteous and to condemn wickedness. That is what we need to do. And if any man tries to quote Jesus, who does it in a wicked way, twisting the Bible, twisting the ways of Jesus, we need to immediately recognize that and not uphold the wicked man who is trying to quote the words of Jesus.
I sure hope that you're not just looking for justification to get divorced. Some of you because you have hit a rough patch in your marriage, consider divorce and instead of listening to Jesus, you will listen to the words of a man. You will listen to the words of your own interpretation from the Bible, and you will make yourself feel justified to divorce. We would do much better to continue to stay in fervent prayer. You would do much better to seek the Lord with all your heart and wait on His answer instead of looking around to family members, to prophets, to pastors, to leaders in the church for answers. There is no easy, quick answer for you. Jesus expects that we just wait on Him. And as we daily seek Him, He gives us our daily bread. And as we pray, He gives us the revelation we need. Sometimes He calls us to sit back and to continue to pray for our spouse, that they may repent. Sometimes He may have people that are in a very bad, abusive relationship separate for some time, maybe a year, and then He will restore that marriage. Who knows what the Lord will do, but that is His business.
Not someone else's as a middleman getting in between God's plan for your marriage. So don't let any of my words confuse you. I never want something I say to be a hindrance from people going to Jesus Christ. may no one look to me for justification for evil. If you're looking to do evil, your sins are your own. They're not mine. But as for me, I want to encourage people to follow Jesus, to endure. I want to encourage people that they should continue to fight for their marriage, overcome lust, defeat pornography, expose sin. I want to continue to uphold the righteous, uphold the innocent. I want to be an advocate for those who are pure before God. And all of us need to do that as His true church. And as each situation comes up individually, we just need to go before the Lord and ask Him what we need to do.
But don't let anyone manipulate you from the Bible telling you you should get divorced, or it's justifiable, or that you shouldn't, meaning that you shouldn't separate if it is the will of God that you separate for your own protection of yourself and your family. I cannot offer you any words of wisdom as the Holy Spirit can. But my words of wisdom are this: if you seek the Lord, He gives to all liberally for those who will sit at His feet and learn from Him. Are we going to Jesus? Are we waiting upon Him in prayer? Or are we running to men for answers? May the grace of Jesus be with you.
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